Jul 31, 2018

Retrogression



…and our dreams from which our realities are made,
After all, we should have listened to them;
We could have been of our own divining…

The layman is short but in his twenties, and
Long strands of black flow from his heart;
Two women sit in the shade, and they discuss it:
Who am I but everything he never wanted--
The person who makes ill-wills come true,
And, the bringer of misfortune and malintent.
I am the dreamer of men gone sane from obvious madness--
In the nightmares, our villainous are respected,
the heroes ignored, and the fiendishly frantic women
Submit to the surveyors who hide the rich's exact locations.
A man, called the May King, 
keeps track of those who be making out,
So that those who are closer to the truth never whisper in the ear,
And thus, he may continue to hide the true reality from humanity.
Years pass, and he sets in motion a plan that will make everyone feel well-accomplished,
even though no one has written a unique song, poem, or built something of high art in years,
so escaping the happiness offered from him to them,
a villainous intellectual who knows of his scheme to blind humanity hears.
He hears as his heart fills with want of escape his arms with rage, 
observing the women and men seeking ways of exploiting each other's lives
‘till earth itself gives no more and dies.
At the wrong time, the King of ignorance rises from his grave to power, 
and he wonders like a baby addicted to it's future death while in a guise.
He knows his opponents are villains of the New World;
after all, we have all met their manifested destinies and have achieved our fruitless happinesses;
No higher life exists according to him; 
Our mindsets were built on the sweats of pleasures and wars,
And we wouldn't be here for their courageous sacrifices.
But the May King would never say what he can say,
And the ignorant consign of a fantasy implies that truth is a complicit disease leading to further fruitlessness truthfully. 
The laymen women dine merrily at an exterior restaurant,
And I am at a balcony, listening to their melodies and musings:
The two women, particularly, serenade of the nuisances of their lives,
And the arrogance hated and the creepiness perceived by the May King.
They dialogue: I am your dark corridor in your delusional ignorance,
I cannot see him nor interfere,
And I cannot move to him or his city,
And illegally I cannot tie myself to him and say he did this
Of his own hands and rope.
But I do not love him, and I love myself,
in the dark, and in the silence;
I am the passive piercing music in the dark.
He sits in the rain and lacks everything I ever wanted,
for I was nothing itself, and he never said he loved me.




Jul 12, 2018

Eulogy - Grandpa Cook

Barney Cook, my grandpa on my mother's side (not-related directly,) passed away this morning, from natural causes. He served the armed forces in WW II, and he was a good man. He loved to sing, "I scream for ice cream," or its reverse meaning since he was a mathematician, when the time was right, and many other songs... When we were younger, he told us stories about his boy-scout years, but now I wish I asked more; the one story that I heard more than once was the day he couldn't solve a difficult calculus problem, in college, and then the night after he woke up--he had solved the problem in his sleep. He was a straight A student who went to the prestigious University of Chicago, and I think he was the top of his class. When I visited their Clear Lake cabin, he would give me math problems, and I would always learn something new, and he happily would answer my questions since math was his cup of tea. He had many great tastes in music--dixie chicks, Chopin, Mozart, Bach, but mostly whatever Grandma Laura liked. In my few years at Florida State University (he lived in Tallahassee,) he was exceptionally generous and he and Grandma Cook took care of me, helping me find work at various commercial locations. He loved my grandmother, his sisters, his kids, and us; but that was because he was an intelligent man; he was a nuclear physicist who invested in the Dogs of the Dow Jones Industrials, and in his last few years of his life, after his stroke, he liked to watch the news as much as possible, on T.V. He never liked the change of direction for this country and Trump. I visited my grandparents, often, and he not once became angry at me. I am almost certain that is what sucked the last mental energy from him, but he was 94. :(